I started this blog not only for me, but for anyone else who is considering egg donation in the family. I will chronicle the IVF cycle I am about to start on with my youngest sister as egg donor. First, a history. I am going to really try to keep it as short as possible, but it’s been a long haul, so find someplace comfortable to sit, this could take a minute.
My husband J and I started dating in 1999. We moved in together in 2003. Got engaged in 2007 and were married in September 2008. We started trying for a baby right around the time of our wedding. It was not something we thought would happen RIGHT away, but we figured within a few months we’d be pregnant. Fast forward 2 long and sometimes really difficult years and we were considering seeing a specialist. It just seemed like it should have happened by the two year mark. In October 2010, I decided to contact my doctor and set up some testing, but wanted to get through a few weddings and events we were to attend first. Then on October 20th, after being 5-6 days late, I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. We couldn’t believe it, but we were thrilled.
After a relatively easy pregnancy (my only complaint was a small amount of nausea, though I would definitely not have categorized it that way while I was experiencing it) I gave birth to our Daughter Little T in July 2011. We could NOT have been more excited to welcome her. It was the best day of our lives.
After Little T hit about 6 months old I was already thinking about and planning for our next addition to the family. We had always talked about having 3-4 kids and keeping them fairly close in age. We tried for another difficult year before deciding it was time to see a doctor.
After some testing in January of 2013, we discovered that I have High FSH, which just means that my eggs have aged well before they should have and my ovaries are trying harder to get them going. This was a devastating blow. I’ve never had major problems with my period and I’m very fit and healthy, so i really couldn’t understand why this had happened. And the worst part is that no one could tell me why it had happened either.
The doctor recommended going straight to IVF, which we agreed with, given the time factor. Insurance felt differently, however, so we did a failed IUI in February 2013. It was sad, but we were kind of expecting a negative, considering that I did not have any tubal issues or blockages that we knew of. We hated the fact that it cost us around $3000 for nothing. It was time to move on to IVF and insurance was finally on board. We did our first failed IVF in May of 2013. It was devastating, as I didn’t even make it to retrieval. I didn’t have enough eggs, so it was converted to an IUI. I was crushed. It cost us another $6,000. I am leaving out the expenses like acupuncture, vitamins, supplements, etc. that really added to the financial stress of all of this.
In August 2013, we embarked on our second IVF. This one went a lot better. I had 6 eggs at retrieval. We were so pleased. Until we got the call the next morning. Only 2 eggs had survived fertilization. But two was enough! So we went forward with the transfer on day two of only one egg, because we lost one the night before. After a very long, very hormonal, very difficult 2 week wait we got our negative beta. At this point, I had decided that we would move forward with Egg Donation. My sister, K had offered me her eggs. K is an amazing sister who is a year younger than I am at 32. She has no children and is not married. She is a lesbian who is not interested in having a bio kid. After K offered, I started setting up her testing. I was so happy and feeling so grateful.
Then my other sister who is 11 years younger than me, T offered her eggs too. I was overcome. I set up her testing too and made an appointment with my doctor. Here is where the story starts.
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